Through my Window by ARIANA Godoy ,Chapter 16,The Kiss

I would like to say that I didn’t kiss him back, or that I pushed him away and ran from him. But the moment his soft lips touch mine, I lose all sense of time, place, space. I lose all rationality. I kiss him back instantly. His kiss is not gentle or romantic; it is demanding, passionate, and possessive. He kisses me as if he wants to devour me, and it feels incredible. He takes my face in his hands, deepening the kiss. Our lips move in sync, his tongue tempting and brushing. Our breaths quicken, and I feel like I could pass out at any moment from the intensity of this kiss. I melt in his arms. I never thought anyone could make me feel this way. My whole body is electrified, blood rushing quickly through my veins. Ares presses my body against his, stealing a small moan from me that gets caught in his mouth. His lips move aggressively against mine, his tongue invading my mouth, sending shivers of pleasure throughout my body. Ares lifts me up, and I immediately wrap my legs around his waist. I gasp as I feel how hard he is against me. He doesn’t stop kissing me for a single second as he carries me over to the couch. He slowly lays me down and climbs on top of me. I run my hands over his defined chest and down his abdomen, feeling every muscle. He’s so fucking sexy. He slips his hand under my shirt to touch my breasts and a moan
of appreciation escapes me. I’m too turned on to think of anything. I just want to feel him, all of him, against me. Ares moves away, kneeling between my legs, and unbuttons my pants with impressive agility. Seeing him like this in front of me—his blue eyes shining with desire, undressing me—takes my breath away. I feel surprisingly comfortable with him as he removes my pants, tossing them aside, and returns his mouth to mine. He runs his hands down my bare legs and moans. “You’re driving me crazy.” I bite his lower lip in response. I want him like I’ve never wanted anyone before in my life. My rational side goes on vacation and hormones take over. Desperately, I grab the button of his pants to take them off. He stands up and lets his pants fall to the floor along with his underwear. God, he’s naked and his body is perfect. Every muscle, every tattoo . . . everything about him is perfect. His lips are swollen from kissing, and I imagine mine must be the same. He hovers over me again, kissing me leisurely, wet kisses full of passion and desire that bring me to the edge. His hand travels inside my panties, and he moans again into my mouth. It’s the most exciting sound in the world. “I love how wet you are for me.” I can feel how hard he is against my thigh and I’m dying to feel him somewhere else. His fingers find that nerve-filled spot and caress it in circles. I arch my back, panting. “Oh God, Ares! Please.” I want him, that’s all my mind can think of. I need more. As if reading my mind, Ares lifts my shirt, freeing my breasts, attacking them with his tongue, massaging them with his free hand. This is too much. Wanting more, I take him in my hand, and, for a second, it scares me how big he is, but my desire overwhelms my fear. “Ares, please.” I don’t even
know what I’m asking for. Ares raises himself just an inch from me, his eyes piercing mine, his fingers still moving inside my panties. “Do you want me to fuck you?” I can only nod, and he licks my lower lip. “Do you want to feel me inside you? Say it.” I bite my lower lip as his fingers drive me insane. “Yes . . . please . . . I want to feel you inside me.” He leans back and reaches for something in his pants, and I watch him pull out a condom and roll it on. Oh God, I’m really going to do this. I’m going to lose my virginity to Ares Hidalgo. In seconds, he’s on top of me, in between my legs, and a wave of fear sweeps through me, but he kisses me passionately, taking it away, and making me forget everything. He positions himself and leans back from me, looking into my eyes. “Are you sure?” I lick my lips nervously. “Yes.” Ares kisses me and I close my eyes, losing myself in his soft, rich lips. But then I feel him slowly penetrate me. I moan in pain and tears fill my eyes. “Ares, it hurts.” He leaves short kisses all over my face. “I know. It’s okay; it’ll pass.” He sinks into me a little further and I arch my back. I feel something inside me break and then he fills me completely. Tears roll down the sides of my face. “Kiss me,” he says. He’s inside me, but he doesn’t move. His kisses are wet, passionate, while his hands touch my breasts gently, distracting me, bringing excitement back to my aching body.
He doesn’t hurry to move, he only focuses on exciting me even more, tempting, kissing, biting my lips, my neck, my breasts. The pain is still there, but it’s lessening and only the burning discomfort of something that has broken remains. I need more, I need something, and I need him to move. I am so ready for him to move. “Ares,” I gasp. As if he knows what I want, he starts to move slowly. The friction burns a little, but I’m so wet that it starts to feel delicious. Oh God, the sensation overcomes me, I’ve never felt so good in my entire life. Suddenly I want him to go faster, deeper. I put my hands around his neck and kiss him with everything I have, moaning and feeling him perfectly hard inside me. “Ares! Oh God, Ares, faster.” Ares smiles at my lips. “You want it faster, huh? Do you like it?” He thrusts into me deeply before he starts moving faster. “Oh my God!” “Raquel,” he murmurs in my ear as I cling to his back. “Do you like feeling me like this, all inside you?” “Yes!” I can feel the orgasm coming and I moan so loudly that Ares kisses me to silence it. Suddenly, my body explodes, wave after wave of pleasure invading every part of me. Ares moans with me and his movements become clumsy and even faster. He comes and falls on top of me. Our quickened breathing echoes throughout the room. Our heartbeats can be clearly felt through our glued chests. As the last traces of orgasm leave me, clarity returns. Oh my God! I just had sex with Ares. I just lost my virginity. Ares uses his hands to hoist himself up and gives me a short kiss, pulling out of me. It burns a little, but it’s nothing I can’t handle. I see traces of blood on the condom, and I look away, sitting up. He takes the condom and throws it in the trash and then puts on his pants and hands me my clothes. He sits on
the arm of the couch and just looks at me without speaking. He doesn’t talk to me, doesn’t say nice things to me, doesn’t even hug me . . . nothing. It’s like he’s impatient for me to leave. The silence is too uncomfortable, so I get dressed as quickly as I can. I stand up and wince. “Are you okay?” I nod my head. Ares’s eyes land on the couch behind me and I follow his gaze. There’s a small but noticeable bloodstain. Ares seems to pick up on my embarrassment. “Don’t worry, I’ll have it washed.” I twist my hands in front of me. “I-I should go.” He doesn’t object; he doesn’t say “don’t go” or “why are you leaving?” He doesn’t say anything at all, so I start walking toward the door. My heart is in my throat, and I feel like crying, but I won’t let the tears form in my eyes. I grab the doorknob, and he suddenly speaks. “Wait!” Hope kindles in me, but it shatters right away when I see him walking toward me with the phone box in his hand. “Please accept it.” And that gesture makes me feel even worse, like he’s paying me back for what just happened. Unruly tears fill my eyes, and I can’t speak. I open the door and hurry out. “Raquel! Hey! Don’t go like that! Raquel!” I hear him shouting behind me. Before I know it, I’m running to the exit. I bump into the redheaded girl again, but I ignore her and continue on my way. Out on the street, tears run down my cheeks. I know I’m responsible for what just happened. He didn’t make me do it, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.
I always thought that my first time would be magical, a special moment, that the guy I was with would value and appreciate it, that he would at least have feelings for me. The sex was wonderful and increased my feelings for Ares, but this meant nothing to him. It was just sex. And he warned me, he told me clearly what he wanted, but I was stupid and gave him what was most precious to me. I keep running until my lungs burn. When I get home, I throw myself on my bed and cry inconsolably.